What I Think when I am Enduring

A few days ago I was talking with a friend about life and the things
we had done since we had seen each other. Several of those things
involved me pushing on when others were not. My friend said, "You are
endurance. What do you think when you are doing this stuff?" It is a
good question. One that I don't remember anyone else ever asking, or
at least asking the way he did in the context of a double marathon.

I thought about that most of the way across Kansas. My conclusion is
first of all that I don't know what other people think. Second, it is
a challenge and an experience so I usually ask myself the question,
"can I do it?" instead of dwelling on the possibilty of failure I
dwell on the possibilty of success. I think I can do it but I don't
know until I try.

Also, and not to sound cliche but by just worrying about taking one
more step makes it seem smaller. Of course your mind has to be working
pretty fast to think about taking one more step, looking where you
will put your foot, moving that foot, then again considering the
possibilty that you can take one more step. While I am running this
happens about 190 times per minute so there is not much time to doubt
my ability to take the next step. Most of the time is spent thinking
where I will place my foot or doing thinking not related to ending the
run.

As an example on my double marathon it was easier the first 45 miles
because one of my friends was still running. At 50 miles my friends
cheered me on and I was super happy and motivated. At 51 miles I was
in tears because I was so sore and tired. However, the goal was so
close that I just had to keep stepping and I thought I would get
there. I finally did.